I wouldn't say anything at this point. You don't owe her a thing and you will probably never meet her. It isn't like you are trying to mislead her. It is her problem whether she "associates" with an "apostate". That is one of the reasons why the WT discourages their members from going to discussion groups because you never know who is behind the screen. The only way I would ever bring it up would be to try to help her if you felt the need to or saw she was really struggling.
Aunt Fancy
JoinedPosts by Aunt Fancy
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19
Should I Tell a Witness that I Am an Apostate?
by Band on the Run ini sometimes join discussion groups.
the witnesses do get mentioned.
i try to make it humorous but some bitterness seeps through.
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61
How did you tell your spouse you want out of the JW religion?
by leaving_quietly inwhat did you imagine would happen?
did they react the way you expected?
how did you bring it up?.
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Aunt Fancy
We came out together but I was the one who started researching first. My hubby was a born in for almost 58 years with grandparents that were in the religion in the early 1900's and I came in in my late 20's spending 30 years in. He was an elder for many years but stepped down because he didn't like some of the things that were going on.
I ended up getting very sick which most of it was because of the stress of the religion and so I missed meetings. I wanted to quit years ago but I didn't know how to get away from it because I knew I would lose all of my friends. (Not one of my family or extended family is in, that goodness). Finally I had missed so many meetings and I noticed I felt better when I was away and when I went to the KH I had panic attacks. During the last year we were in we started seeing a therapist together and she helped me get the courage to do what was right for me.
I read a couple of ex JW books and went to some meetings but I would tell my husband things I was so angry about. In our relationship I tell him everything about how I feel and if I am angry with him I tell him. I do not sugar coat things or hid things from him. If I feel something is not right at the meetings I would tell him and I would call those brothers on the carpet to him. I came from a very long line of strong woman and both parents were college educated.
we went to the DC 7/12 and the first day we left 2 hours early and never went back we were so disgusted by the talk telling us to listen to the elders and do what they say. When we got in we angry and we never went back to the rest of the convention. i started reading COC and I would read him things from it and at first her would give the canned JW answer and that would piss me off and finally I told him "that is exactly what this book said you would say to me. He said let me read the book when you are done with it. He started reading and it was in no time before he was out himself. we both read everything we could get out hands on. He willing cam out but AI know he was ready and he saw too much injustice and was do e with it.
it has been a roller coaster ride but My family has bee wonderful to us and we are slowing making new friends and we are getting involved in things and meeting new friends. I ask my hubby why he listened to me when I told him the info I uncovered and he said because he loves and respects me too much.
Our marriage, health and a number of other things have never been this good in 33 years of being together.
I think you have everything to gain if get the courage to tell your spouse. I later asked him why he listened to me and he said because I respect you.
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Were you 'alive in '75' and how was that year for you?
by punkofnice ini was a junior borgite in 1975. i remeber looking at the calendar at work in october and thinking: 'armageddon isn't here yet.....and it doesn't feel like it will be here anytime soon either!'.
i was surprised that jehovah hadn't obeyed the superior command to bring the big 'a' as instructed to him by fred franz.
how dare god disobey the jw leader!!!!!.
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Aunt Fancy
I was not in at that time but my husband was 21 and I asked him about it because he had never talked about it until a few months ago. He had his great grandparents and parents that were JW's and I am not sure why but his family never made a big deal out of 1975. It could be because they heard them give earlier dates and they never happened. He was young married, a MS, working hard, buying a house, starting a business so maybe he was just so involved in making things work in his life.
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Should I allow my mom to see the grandchildren?
by confusedandalone inso i am not officially da/do yet and my family has shunned me hard.
today crying my mother calls me to beg to see my children... should i let her?
i feel that if you can speak abusive of your own son and wife and shun the.
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Aunt Fancy
I don't know how old your children are but in our case my son never got baptized and his wife was not a JW. We would get the kids over night and we would take them bowling, miniture golf, and do all kids of baking and fun things. We had a blast with them until one day things changed. My husband would read to the two young grandchildren out of the My book of Bible Stories and my grandson told him "Poppy, my Mom doesn't want you to read us any religion at all". My husband stopped and we continued on to have a wonderful relationship with them Never to bring it up again and now we are both out enjoying the holidays with them. We loved our son, daughter in law and two grandchildren enough and respected that they were their children and they had the right to raise them how they chose to.
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Should I allow my mom to see the grandchildren?
by confusedandalone inso i am not officially da/do yet and my family has shunned me hard.
today crying my mother calls me to beg to see my children... should i let her?
i feel that if you can speak abusive of your own son and wife and shun the.
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Aunt Fancy
Excellent advice given. After what your mom, dad and brother did to try to get you DF'd I would be very careful letting them have visits. I have heard of many cases where another relative turned the children against the non JW parents. I would only allow a visit if it were supervised. Also teach your children about the harmful cult that way if they are ever in a position where your family talks to them about their beliefs they will be prepared and can resist it.
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HANDLING CHEMOTHERAPY - Advice anyone?
by hamsterbait ini have just been diagnosed with colorectal cancer (tuesday).. the consultant told me i am to get a scan to see how far it has spread.. i am going to have surgery to remove it, then chemotherapy with a break in the middle.. strange to say i am more terrified of dying under the anesthetic than anything.
but i have a fear of nausea and vomiting, which chemo caused in all my relatives who have had it.. any advice for coping with this?.
hb.
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Aunt Fancy
I am sorry to hear you are going through this but there are so many successful treatments out there. I went through breast cancer recently but only had to do radiation and no chemo. I found the cancer center I went to was fantastic. They were very kind and their reputation was top notch. They will most likely have a number of professionals meet with you and help you every step of the way. Mine had a support group and there was nutritional help along with many other programs. Take advantage of anything they offer that will benefit you. Hang in there and we will be thinking of you.
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Elder and CO just dropped by....
by El_Guapo ini haven't been to a meeting in over a year, and as you know as soon as you stop attending meetings/fieldservice the "conditional" love becomes more apperant.
the coordinating elder starts off by saying how much he loves and misses me, etc.
i ask him, when was the last time you called or texted me?
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Aunt Fancy
That is funny because the exact thing happened to us. We faded 18 months ago and they stopped by last year when the CO was visiting the cong and then came by last Saturday again. Neither time we answered but your answer was perfect. Because of what you said you may get some invitations but I double it because our local needs were always hospitality and it never changed. The elders never had people into their homes.
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61
List Reasons Why You Are Glad That You Are Out Of The JW Religion
by minimus inhere's a few from me.. no more having to go to stupid boring meetings.. no more having to go knock on doors in field service and waste my time!.
no more mind numbing elders meetings..
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61
List Reasons Why You Are Glad That You Are Out Of The JW Religion
by minimus inhere's a few from me.. no more having to go to stupid boring meetings.. no more having to go knock on doors in field service and waste my time!.
no more mind numbing elders meetings..
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Aunt Fancy
I am free!
My mental and physical health have turned around.
I have a positive outlook on life and it is exciting now.
My relationship with my family is so much better.
Celebrating holidays & life with my family again.
No longer having to go to meetings, field service or read that crap!
Life is good!
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From Captives of a Concept: Gods Prophet, Hypocrisy and Propaganda used to control.
by Jon Preston ini teresting info from caltives of a concept....i cannot express how fantastic this book has been and i highly recommend it.
the first thing i found to be huge.
(because the society trues to explain it away so well):.
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Aunt Fancy
Jon, have you read Crisis of Conscience? My husband and I faded 18 months ago together. The first book I read was by Diane Wilson called "Awakening of a Jehovah's Witness: Escape from the Watchtower Society". This is an excellent book especially for women because it shows how they have treated women and so many other basic things. Then I read a book by David Reed and after that I found COC. I have since read many other books on this subject but I was able to get my husband to read COC and that woke him up very quickly. It wasn't until I read COC that I realized there were all of these great sites out here to get support and help. I wish you the best in getting her out.